Eagle1
08-16-2004, 09:15 AM
This is adapted from other sources, with apologies.
It started out innocently enough. I began to make casual and periodic modifications to my car to feel happy. Inevitably, one modification led to another, and soon I was more than just a casual modder. I began to make tweaks and adjustments late at night and early in the morning when I was alone "to relax"....but I knew that wasn't true. Modding became more and more important to me, and finally, I was modding all the time.
That was when things began to sour at home. One evening I had turned off the TV and told my wife I was going to spend the night installing neon light tubes underneath the car that would oscillate to the bass beat on my 500Watt trunk stereo system. She spent that night at her mother's.
I began to work on mod programs on the job, searching the internet for ideas and advice. I knew that modding and employment don't mix, but I could not stop myself. I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could check out cryogenic cooling sprayers for intercoolers, and chinchilla fur headliners. I would get back to work after breaks dizzied and confused, asking, "can I borrow your graphing calculator for some suspension geometry integrals I want to run through?"
One day the boss called me in...he said, "Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your modding has become a real problem. Pulling into the company garage with 750hp straight piped is blowing all the reserved signs off the walls and sets off all the other car alarms. If you don't stop modding, you will have to find another job."
This caused me to retreat home early to the garage with my power tools to relieve the stress with more modding. When my wife came in I said to her "Honey", I have been modding and...."....."I know you have been modding," she said,"and I want a divorce!"
"But Honey, surely it is not that serious."
"It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver. "You mod as much as street corner gas station attendants, and they don't make enough money to live on their own, so if you keep on modding, we will be forced to live with our parents!"
"That is something that I can fix too" I said impatiently. She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama.
"I'm going to the parts store," I snarled as I stomped out the door. I headed for the Auto Zone, in the mood for some one step colder spark plugs and a brake bleeder kit. I roared into the parking lot, with the Autoweek radio program blasting, and ran up to the big glass doors...They did not open. The store was closed for the night! To this day I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night.
As I sank to the ground, clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for a torque wrench, a poster caught my eye. "Friend, is heavy modding ruining your life?" it asked. You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard "Modders Anonymous poster. Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering modder...I never miss a MA meeting.
At each meeting, we watch a non automotive video. Last week it was Wuthering Heights. Then we share experiences about how we avoided modding since the last meeting. I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home.
Life just seemed easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped modding. I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for me.
It started out innocently enough. I began to make casual and periodic modifications to my car to feel happy. Inevitably, one modification led to another, and soon I was more than just a casual modder. I began to make tweaks and adjustments late at night and early in the morning when I was alone "to relax"....but I knew that wasn't true. Modding became more and more important to me, and finally, I was modding all the time.
That was when things began to sour at home. One evening I had turned off the TV and told my wife I was going to spend the night installing neon light tubes underneath the car that would oscillate to the bass beat on my 500Watt trunk stereo system. She spent that night at her mother's.
I began to work on mod programs on the job, searching the internet for ideas and advice. I knew that modding and employment don't mix, but I could not stop myself. I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could check out cryogenic cooling sprayers for intercoolers, and chinchilla fur headliners. I would get back to work after breaks dizzied and confused, asking, "can I borrow your graphing calculator for some suspension geometry integrals I want to run through?"
One day the boss called me in...he said, "Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your modding has become a real problem. Pulling into the company garage with 750hp straight piped is blowing all the reserved signs off the walls and sets off all the other car alarms. If you don't stop modding, you will have to find another job."
This caused me to retreat home early to the garage with my power tools to relieve the stress with more modding. When my wife came in I said to her "Honey", I have been modding and...."....."I know you have been modding," she said,"and I want a divorce!"
"But Honey, surely it is not that serious."
"It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver. "You mod as much as street corner gas station attendants, and they don't make enough money to live on their own, so if you keep on modding, we will be forced to live with our parents!"
"That is something that I can fix too" I said impatiently. She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama.
"I'm going to the parts store," I snarled as I stomped out the door. I headed for the Auto Zone, in the mood for some one step colder spark plugs and a brake bleeder kit. I roared into the parking lot, with the Autoweek radio program blasting, and ran up to the big glass doors...They did not open. The store was closed for the night! To this day I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night.
As I sank to the ground, clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for a torque wrench, a poster caught my eye. "Friend, is heavy modding ruining your life?" it asked. You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard "Modders Anonymous poster. Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering modder...I never miss a MA meeting.
At each meeting, we watch a non automotive video. Last week it was Wuthering Heights. Then we share experiences about how we avoided modding since the last meeting. I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home.
Life just seemed easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped modding. I think the road to recovery is nearly complete for me.